It causes stress and anxiety, keeps you awake at night, ruins your fingernails, and robs you of the moment.
We hear it everywhere - "We live in dangerous times." It’s naïve to think that we can go through life and not worry – (queue "Don’t Worry, Be Happy" – and loop it ad nauseam through my brain.). But we don't have to let worry rule our lives.
There are those times, when we, as parents, become obsessive in our worries. It could be about grades, a decision we made, divorce, a move, a transition, something we said or did.
We pass this on to our kids. We stop them, hold them back, push them too hard - all out of something that is in our heads.
Kids take their cues from us, even if they don't show it. That includes the positive and the negative. If we're worried about them, they must somehow merit the concern. A difficult thing to process since most worries lean toward the irrational.
We spend so much time stressing over something that has happened or will happen that we forget about the here and now.
Here's what I know:
You can’t change what happened – you can only move forward from there.
We worry about what may happen, which means it may not. We cannot predict the future, but we can help to design it.
What to do?
It’s always good to get your concerns out of your head and into the open. Sometimes all it takes is for you to voice a concern to take away the power that it has over you. Other times – a simple tweak can change your perspective. And then there are those times that require a plan of action. You cannot be in action and worry about a matter at the same time. Like oil and vinegar – they don’t mix.
Four-step action plan:
Figure out how it serves you. There are pros and cons to everything. Your worry is in somehow, some way, serving you. Figure out what that may be- what are you gaining by worrying? Then understand what your worry is taking away from you.
Write it down. Try not to go to bed with it swirling around your brain, interrupting your sleep, looming over you larger than life.
Act on what you can (and there’s always something). Hint: you can’t control someone else’s behavior – you can control your own.
Get help. Speak to a friend, doctor, teacher, me. Don’t let worry rob you of your now.
(And, yes, the song is still in my head.)
is an expert in helping kids to develop the confidence and self-esteem skills that they need to thrive now, and grow into happy, confident, successful adults. Her more than 40 years in education, along with her training as a coach and practical experience gained from raising her own 4 children, give her an understanding of the needs of each child, as well as the needs of a parent. This makes her uniquely qualified to help children, support parents, and nurture tomorrow’s leaders. Her programs provide hands-on experiences for children allowing them to explore and grow while building skills and having fun.
For 24/7 support and inspirations, join our facebook group.
If you are someone who is looking for wisdom and support, schedule a SKYROCKET YOUR CHILD'S SUCCESS SESSION today.
We'll look at their goals, challenges they are facing, opportunities they might be missing. We'll also uncover hidden problems that may be sabotaging their desired results. You'll leave the session feeling renewed, re-energized, and inspired to get results faster and easier then you thought possible. And you'll have a plan of action to do just that.
"Action is the foundational key to all success." Picasso